I'm between a rock and a hard place...

because I love books...

however...

I'm too thick to be bright

and

I'm too bright to be thick...

Geddit?

My studio is a testament to my love of books, I'm even having more book shelves built in my 'cosy', cavernous oak room to accommodate the overflow - Kindle eat your heart out.

Every paper/periodical I open, if there's a photo of someone in front of a bookshelf I crane my neck trying to see what's on their shelves.

I plough through the 'Christmas books - FT critics select their favourite fiction of the year' knowing full well only a tiny selection will be within my limited quota of IQ. Alright I know I should be looking at the The Sun's critics choice... problem there is, I'm too blooming brainy not to be hugely irritated by the lightness of the recommended tomes.

Where do I go from there I ask myself?